As promised in yesterday's post, here is a short excerpt from Stelladaur: Finding Tir Na Nog, Chapter 13 titled, "Awareness". Reilly is in a parallel world talking with a creature named Porfino, whose third eye, a purple jewel centered between his other two eyes, mesmerizes Reilly and he begins to question where he is and what he wants.
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Porfino took a step forward and gazed with his azurite eye at Reilly’s Stelladaur, creating a ray of indigo light between the two of them. Suddenly, Reilly felt something wrap around him. He reached out but his finger bumped into an invisible wall. At his touch, the wall lit up in an iridescent indigo light like a giant soap bubble, reflecting rainbow colors from the sunlight. But the bubble did not pop when he touched it. Instead, it made an ahhm sound, like a meditating Tibetan monk. Both the light from the bubble and the tonal frequency lasted only a few seconds after Reilly touched it. With intention, he touched it again and the bubble lit up, accompanied by the single chant. Then he placed his entire palm on the invisible wall and it lit up much brighter, making his hand radiate in a purple glow. The ahhm continued in a series of prolonged notes.
Reilly wondered if it was a game, like one of the imagination games of Jolka. But the sensation was different in this experience, so he wasn’t sure.
“No, it is not a game.”
Of course, Reilly thought, if Fiala could read my mind, I should have guessed Porfino could, too.
“What is it?” Reilly asked as he touched the bubble again with his palm.
“It is not named,” Porfino said, “but it represents the awareness in all you experience and all that you are.” The bubble reflected in his middle eye.
“You mean like understanding why something is the way it is?”
“No, simply being aware that it is.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Before you touched the screen of the bubble—which is not really what it is, but I only give it a label so you can identify it—you did not know it was there. However, it was always there. You were just unaware of its existence. Is it now necessary for you to understand it, to know that it is?”
“I guess not.”
“It is only necessary that you are aware of its existence.”
Reilly scowled, confused.
“How do you know it is there?” Porfino probed.
“I can see it when I touch it.”
“Yes, but what if you did not have eyes to see? Would that mean it did not exist?”
“No.”
“How would you know it exists?”
“I can hear it.”
“Yes, but what if you did not have ears to hear? Would that mean it did not exist?”
“No.”
“Then how do you know it exists?”
Reilly thought before answering. “Well ... something sort of wrapped around me. It’s hard to explain. But it felt protective, not restrictive.”
“Why do you think you so quickly forgot the feeling that first told you of its existence?”
Reilly thought again before responding. “I don’t know. Maybe because I just wanted to see if it was really there, so I reached out to try and touch it.”
“You thought your eyes or your ears would be a better guide than your feelings to tell you of its existence.”
“Yeah, I suppose so.” Reilly’s voice had gained an introspective tone.
“Feelings are an indicator that awareness is awakening within. When you learn to trust your feelings you will begin to recognize yourself.”
“You mean I will know what I want?”
“No, you will know you.” Reilly raised his eyebrows.
“Awareness is the space between what you think you know and what actually is. Some people catch glimpses of this power. However, it is not awareness of self that brings this realization, but attention to the awareness.”
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Porfino gives us more than enough to consider for today.
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